To my father

I reflect upon the life of a man. He wasn’t a politician, a movie star, a scientist, or a doctor. He didn’t raise armies or make brilliant discoveries, didn’t fight for world peace, or have claim to any riches. He was a father, a son, a grandfather, a brother. My dad.

He taught me to always try to be kind, but to never fail to be smart. To follow my dreams, and to always, always do everything from a place of passion, love, and heart. I will always remember his smile and see the reflection of his eyes looking back at me when I look in the mirror. I will remember the good times, and the bad. I will remember his lessons. I will remember his love. And I will try to keep living my life and reaching for the heights that would make him proud.

It’s been a little over a week. I’ve looked at so many pictures, relived so many memories. I’m sad, frustrated, angry, and at a loss. Grief ebbs and flows. I remember silly stories at random, like the time you dressed up like your mother for Halloween, or how you’d always order your dessert with your meal. I remember moments, frozen in the flow of my memories; sitting on your shoulders to grab a peach from our backyard tree, learning how to drive, fishing together. Those ridiculous but delicious little “breakfast” sandwiches you make us on summer vacation. I miss you, dad. I miss hearing your voice on the phone. I miss getting your gardening advice. I miss the way you’d tell me to “just be careful” up here in NYC and how I’d roll my eyes. I miss your laughter.

I miss you. So much.

I love you, daddy.

One response to “To my father

  1. Hello Meaghan,

    My name is Kenneth Spicer. I was sadden to learn of your father’s passing, and offer my sincere condolence to you and your mother. I met your father in 1968 at Bethune-Cookman University (“college” back then) where we became brothers in Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity. We continued our friendship throughout much of the 1970s in Miami, but thru time and distance our connections drifted. He was always a good friend, and as I read your thoughts and memories —- a great father to you.
    I’ll remember him.

    Kenneth Spicer – Boston, Massachusetts
    k_spicersr@msn.com

    Like

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